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We’ve arrived to the slow, painful time of the college football offseason, so what better way to cure the offseason blues with quotes from the Head Ball Coach? Below, we hand-picked some of our favorite Steve Spurrier quotes from his headset throwing days. Enjoy!

“I don’t know. I sort of always liked playing them that second game because you could always count on them having two or three key players suspended.” -Spurrier on facing Georgia early in the season.

“You can’t spell Citrus without U-T.” -Talking about how Tennessee missed out on the Sugar Bowl during his time at Florida years.

On Peyton Manning: “I know why Peyton came back for his senior year. He wanted to be a three-time star of the Citrus Bowl.”

More jabs at Georgia: “Why is it that during recruiting season they sign all the great players, but when it comes time to play the game, we have all the great players? I don’t understand that. What happens to them?”

“You know what FSU stands for, don’t you? Free Shoes University.”

“I didn’t know Jadeveon’s car that could go that fast. He doesn’t have a pretty car like those FSU guys used to drive.” -On Jadeveon Clowney getting a speeding ticket.

“The real tragedy was that 15 hadn’t been colored yet.” -On a fire at the Auburn library that destroyed 20 books.

“We were 7-6. Same as Tennessee, same as Arkansas. I think they’re sorta celebrating big seasons last year. … There are people in Knoxville and Fayetteville still doing cartwheels over going 7-6.” -On Tennessee and Arkansas having the same record as South Carolina two seasons ago.

“Well, like I told people, I breezed right through age 60, breezed right through 65, and I’m going to try my best to breeze right on through 70. I can still remember just about everything. So mentally, I think I’m the same as I was. We got two people running for president, I think Hillary and Donald Trump are both 69, I believe. Coach K at Duke, he’s still doing pretty good at, I think 69 also. So the age really doesn’t mean a lot.”

“He’s from Pluto, and I’m from Mars.” Spurrier responded: “Dabo probably thinks there’s only, what, nine planets out there? I think I read where Pluto may not be considered one now.” -Spurrier on Clemson head coach Dabo Swinney.

Never change, Steve.

Spurrier golf dance

[H/T: ESPN]

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