March Madness vasectomies
AP Photo/David J. Phillip

March Madness Vasectomies are Real, Proving Men Will Do Anything to Watch Sports

For those of us who laughed through health class when our teacher revealed a picture of a guy's nutsack and explained a vasectomy, here's a refresher on what exactly it is. The minimally invasive procedure is nearly 100-percent effective and is incredibly common with more than 500,000 performed in the U.S. each year, according to the American Urological Association. The procedure takes only a few days of rest to recover, which gives men the perfect excuse to just sit around all day and watch March Madness.

The NCAA Tournament commences during the second or third week of March every year and draws millions of casual fans to fill out brackets and try to predict that year's Cinderella story. The massive draw is the sports world's most iconic postseason tournament, but it's connected to the strange coincidence that guys have "The Snip" performed at a much higher rate when March rolls around.

According to a study conducted by athenaInsight, 173 urology practices in the athenahealth network were researched. Of the 235,000 visits of men between the ages of 20 and 49, there were 279 snips performed during an average week in 2016. During that year's men's college basketball tournament, however, the number of vasectomies in that group increased by 41 percent on the first Friday of the tournament and were up 30 percent overall during the entire first week of March Madness.

Probably just a coincidence that men sit around with frozen peas on their junk, hoping to win this coveted Bracket Challenge Trophy during the biggest sporting event of the year, right?

The Urology Center of Columbus said it best: "It's not madness, just great planning!"

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As March brings the perfect excuse for men to call off work, urologists aren't blind to the sudden influx of guys looking to get their tubes tied.

Many offices offer deals and discounts each year to capitalize on 'Vas Madness.' From offices offering a free pizza for each vasectomy to one urologist who bought an entire recovery kit for his patients, March is quickly becoming a battleground for not only college basketball's top teams, but also some added business for urology's best pipe cutters.

"Major sporting events are a popular time for men to schedule a vasectomy because we advise them to take it easy for two to three days after the procedure," Dr. Jim Dupree, an assistant professor of urology at University of Michigan Medicine, said in 2018. "For most men, this means sitting on the couch in front of their television, and sporting events offer them something to watch while resting."

Being a guy, I know that men can do some dumb ass things in the name of sports. Getting a vasectomy is a life-altering decision of permanent birth control for couples, but convincing your significant other to sign off on a weekend-long basketball binge from the couch in the name of "men's health?" That's truly madness.

Kudos to you, future March Madness vasectomy recipient. Make sure to keep those frozen peas and your bracket nearby. Doctor's orders.

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