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Mike Leach AP Photo/Young Kwak

Washington State head coach Mike Leach is a national treasure. Anyone who disagrees hasn’t been paying attention, doesn’t understand, or simply hates having fun. The veteran air raid guru and a live microphone is the perfect match.

There is no time better than the present to talk about the Cougars football coach, but it’s extra special on Valentine’s Day, especially when Washington State rolled out some great marriage advice valentine’s from the hilarious 57-year-old.

So without further ado, here are four cards you should have been able to buy at Target, compliments of the university in Pullman, Washington:

RELATED: If Pac-12 Coaches Had An All-Out Brawl, Mike Leach Knows Who Wins

These are perfect Mike Leach-isms in every way possible.

“Your fiancé is gonna lose their mind, your mother-in-law is gonna lose their mind, your mom, several of your sisters and female relatives.”

“There is no answer that is satisfactory or correct.”

“Take comfort in knowing that once the ceremony is over, life will get significantly better.”

“In the end you’ll wish you eloped.”

If you are asking yourself if Mike Leach actually said these things, the answer is absolutely yes. In the middle of a 9-4 season and third place finish in the Pac-12’s North Division back in 2017, a young reporter asked Leach for marriage advice and he took off on a three-plus-minute long rant you have to hear.

Here’s some another snippet of advice:

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“You need to work late, go in the back room and read a lot of books,” he said. “You have to take the groomsman out so you make sure they march in just right and they know exactly these swell outfits that you picked out or whatever and however you’re doing it… You need to find excuses that they’ll buy to be as far out of harm’s way as you possibly can.”

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Whether you agree or not with this advice is probably pretty irrelevant. It’s just great to kick back and realize college football coach Mike Leach had everything figured out and tried to help the reporter as much as possible.

READ MORE: Mike Leach’s Balance Equation is 50 Percent Stupid and 100 Percent Genius

Author placeholder image About the author:
With over 10 years of sports writing experience, Brett has covered some of the top local, regional, and national sporting events in the Heartland for both print and digital platforms. He is a graduate of Kansas State University and resides in Austin, Texas.
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